my friends A, the college recruiter, and her husband, also A, called me up late yesterday and asked if i might take a look at a house they put a contract on to see if it is renovate-able and to give an estimate, if possible, including my fee.
i went to the house today and was surpised. pleasantly. cute craftsman style cottage that had been updated recently, it would seem. the most surpising thing was the virtual shrine to cher in a curio cabinet which made me think two queens might live there. duh! i had no idea there was a cher barbie! is that barbie in drag as cher, or a single-white-female stalker sort of identity crisis?
AA told me that they had asked a contractor to stop by to see if he thought it was possible to add a dining room and a second bath. when mister hammerswinger showed up, i nearly passed out. he was - how can i put this delicately - a fucking hottie! tall, thin, smooth stomach with a treasure trail leading to the pot o' gold! and nice! well, A, the college recruiter, the realtor and i were all swooning, and i thought that A's hubby had a man crush as well. after he had a look around, contractor pulled out his tape measure and i fainted on the spot.
when i came to, i told A that my answer was that it would be a very smart decision to complete the contract and add on. then i had to break the bad news to her: my fee. i told her it would be a tough, quick project but i was willing to do the hard work. i'm talking late night dinners with the contractor, hotel bills, a week in paris for starters, [just for inspiration you understand] but that it would be a very sucsexful project. i am not exagerating when i say it will be the best money they'll ever spend.
in the background::bringing me down to my knees:roxette
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