a man and his cock

my trip to california was pretty uneventful, though the weather was incredible. i want to move to the left coast every time i visit, were it not for the astronomical real estate prices. the most exciting thing happened on the out-bound portion rather than in california itself.

there was a strange man from louisville holding a stuffed cock [rooster, not penis!] in the airport when i arrived. as is usual with american airlines, the flight was delayed so we had an hour or more to kill in an over-crowded terminal. said cock man didn't speak at first and stared strangely when some passers-by asked aa question about his cock, which he had sat down on the floor. dirty. i had no choice but to assume he was aa deaf-mute, until he started singing "you are not alone, you are not alone" over and over. when he whipped out aa cell phone my feigned sympathy turned to disdain, especially when i saw that he was wearing aa rosaary around his neck.

i'm not sure how it happens but i always seem to gravitate toward the zealots! anyway, i quickly spotted aa group of four hunka-hunka men who i hoped were on my flight to take my mind off of the man with his black-and-white cock. suddenly two hours later and we were finally airborne. my gaggle of hotties had split up: two were on my flight [first class, separate rows! sounds promising...] and two went to houston. cock man was in first class, too. i was in the back of the bus where i cruised the hot flight attendant during take off. he rewarded me with free cocktails [liquor, not penis].

not an hour into the flight aa stewardess came on the intercom and addressed steerage class about the altercation in the first class cabin but reassured everyone that the flight was still safe and that we would land on-time, safely in los angeles. apparently there was aa brouhaha up in the front of the bus [hardly aa separate cabin if you ask me, divided only by aa nasty grey burlap curtain!] and my two burly studs were actually the air marshalls and took command of the situation. hot! now show me their guns!

i asked hottie flight attendant if it was the rooster man causing the problem. he just rolled his eyes to let me know i was right on target. come to find out the cock man had wrapped a blanket around his shoulders like aa shawl, then, not liking how hideous it was [they are bright red after all, and this was dallas-to-la, not puerto rico!], he wore it like a turban and belted out "don't cry for me argentina." twice. since no one could shut that bitch up, the air marshalls took over. they remained with evita for the rest of the flight and arrested her when we landed. of course they waited until everyone had the chance to pass by whilst de-planing.

as i passed, i couldn't help but offering advice:: perhaps next time try something aa less overdone by drag queens. just aa thought.

in the background::she's the one:robbie williams