kansas city::what a drag!

i made it to and from kansas city safe and sound, and even managed to show a friend from dallas around without either of us getting killed, lost, arrested or accosted. for good or bad, we each stayed out of trouble. well, let me re-phrase that: i stayed out of trouble. there is a period of three hours that my buddy j, the accountant, was out of my direct supervision, so no telling what sorts of trouble he stirred up. i do know he was "considering" a massage at one point.

it's been ten years since i've lived in kc 'mo, but i always seem to find out new things about the city each time i visit. and i seem to see things in a different light than what i did when i lived there. the most striking this this trip was that there is not a single bar that does not have a drag queen in it's employ. the leather bar called 'dixie belle' closed down three weeks ago, dammit[!], but every other bar has at leat one [sometimes gaggles!] of queens doing a show.

i used to accuse wichita, kansas of being the drag capital of the universe. now i know it really is kansas city. the cowboy bar: a two-hour drag show on friday night; the bear bar: a drag queen working the stage and i am sure several working the dark room upstairs; dance bar: check. drag bar: check, check, check, check, check! and an additional check for the man who liked lip-synch'ing as a man. how high-school-singing-into-your-hairbrush!

the head drag queen happens to have been a room-mate of mine while in college. she avoids me at any cost for fear i will spill my guts about all of the stories about her. she was a mess then...and still is to some degree. but she is damn funny and is a great emcee. the entire planet is fortunate she does not do any lip synch'ing! just take my word that you are lucky.

on a side note, i decided to wear my swiss flag t-shirt out to test the intelligence/ worldliness of the local 'mo population. they failed. miserably. i got three "oooooer, are you a paramedic?" and one queen, whilst having breakfast at the local after-ber greasy spoon actually yelled across the diner, "and that man over there is trying to call the paramedics with his red cross shirt." i politely pointed out that it wasn't a red cross, it was a white cross on a red background and represents the swiss flag.

"no bitch, the american red cross is actually a white cross, so there you are. thanks for playin'!"

and he minced over to his booth.

well, i never could leave well enough alone [ask my mother, she'll tell you what a smart mouth i have!] so i spouted off

"listen whore, don't make me drive your ass over to linwood boulevard and broadway and drop your ass in front of their headquarters so you can tell me again what colour their goddam cross is. now, game over. you lose. and thank you for playing!"

i told you there weren't very bright.

in the background::stop draggin' my heart around:stevie nicks & tom petty